NEW MOM GANGSTA RAP

“Before you preach, try pushing a watermelon through an opening the size of a peach.”

I got a newborn. You wanna step to me?

I got a newborn, how long can YOU go without sleep?

I got a newborn, so before you preach

Try pushing a watermelon through an opening the size of a peach.

This kid is crying and he’s screaming and he won’t shut up

So I’m swaddling and SHHing him and swinging it up.

Five S’s, John Medina, Happiest Baby on the Block,

I read 70,000 baby books and keep that shit on lock.

My emotions and hormones are making me crazy,

Best believe if you step to me it ain’t gonna phase me cuz

The second I got home from the hospital, best believe this shit got real

(And I mean that literally, like from head to heel).

I got a newborn.

You wanna step to me?

I got a newborn, how long can YOU go without sleep?

I got a newborn, so before you preach

Try pushing a watermelon through an opening the size of a peach.

I’m tore UP.

It’s like a crime scene down there, so

Get your wandering eyes the hell up off my

Derriere.

I’ve got zero sex drive, and

Nothing’s fine I’m torn

Bet Natalie Imbruglia was talking about having a newborn.

My tits are crackling with an electrical pulse

Is it mastitis, a clogged duct, or just a murderous impulse?

Like when you PUMP PUMP PUMP, and your husband dumps the milk

Swear to God I’ll kill you if you waste a drop of that liquid silk.

I’ve got a newborn, you wanna….

I’ve got a n — …..

I’ve got — ….

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.